Alright, don’t let the name fool you—this dish is scary good! Tender beef slow-cooked in rich tomato sauce and spices, then piled onto flatbread in a gloriously messy heap. It’s the kind of recipe that looks horrifyingly fun but tastes like pure comfort. A little chili oil or red pepper flakes will take it from “Ew!” to “OMG!” in seconds.
Ingredients (makes 4–8 servings): • 1 Tbsp oil • ½–1 lb roast beef • ½ Tbsp beefy onion seasoning (such as Lipton’s) • ½ Tbsp brown sugar • 1 Tbsp apple cider vinegar • 1 container unsalted beef broth + 1 Tbsp • 1 cup stewed or diced tomatoes • 1 small jar tomato paste • 1 tsp Worcestershire sauce • 1 onion, julienned • 1 jar no-salt-added peas and carrots • 1–2 packages flatbread
Instructions: 1. In a sealable bag, combine roast beef, onion seasoning, brown sugar, apple cider vinegar, and 1 Tbsp broth. Let marinate in the fridge for 4 hours to overnight. 2. Empty the bag’s contents into a crockpot. Add tomatoes, tomato paste, Worcestershire sauce, onion, peas, and carrots. Mix well. 3. Cook on high for 4 hours until the meat is tender and the sauce thickens. 4. Spoon the mixture onto flatbread and let it spread—it’s supposed to look messy! 5. Optional: sprinkle with pepper flakes or drizzle chili oil for a fiery “spooky upgrade.”
🎃 Halloween Fact: Ancient Celts believed that during Samhain (the origin of Halloween), the barrier between the living and the dead thinned—and leaving out messy offerings of food kept mischievous spirits satisfied and out of trouble. Looks like we’re just carrying on the tradition!
👻 Spooky Serving Idea: Serve your Beefy Upchuck in a black cauldron or on a platter lined with spinach “guts.” Add a swirl of ketchup “blood” and a few olive “eyeballs” on top for a hilariously gory finish.
